


We'll Meet In The Middle

by alafaye



Category: Marvel
Genre: Multi
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-10-22
Updated: 2017-10-22
Packaged: 2019-01-21 04:33:22
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 10,029
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/12449769
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/alafaye/pseuds/alafaye
Summary: Peter doesn't want to have to choose between them. He absolutely does not. But when he proposes a three way relationship, only Wade is (reluctantly) okay with the idea. It takes months and some coaxing, but eventually Johnny agrees to try. Not that that actually solved anything. In the end, they all have to make an effort to make it stick.





	We'll Meet In The Middle

**Author's Note:**

> Written for the 2017 Marvel Big Bang on LJ.
> 
>  
> 
> **Edited as of November 5th.**
> 
>  
> 
> There's art for this, but I don't know what happened to it. I haven't heard from the artist. Furthermore! I have been informed that the characters and this plot is a bit... Off. In some places wildly. *takes a deep breath* So I had this idea churning over in my mind for some months and I figured it'd be good for the big bang, only then it didn't want to be written and now here we are and I've decided: this fic is what it is. Like it or don't, I'm okay with it. It's written. It's done. OOC, weird plot and all. I'm leaving it as it is. (Also because I don't.. I don't know that I have the time and spoons to go about giving this the attention it needs to be done right without starting from scratch.)

Peter dropped down into a crouch on top of a gargoyle, eyes open for any stragglers, but it did appear to be over. Only the clean up left. One nice thing about working with a team, S.H.I.E.L.D. especially, was that Peter didn't have to stick around until the very end to make sure everything went well. And it was nice that he didn't have to hang out in the shadows; he could sit here and watch and wait. Or he could just go home and shower. Sleep some. Or eat. 

A bit of flame caught his eye and he waved at Johnny as the other superhero landed perfectly next to Peter on the ledge. "Nice job out there."

Johnny grinned. "I was awesome! But so were you," he added quickly. "I almost died watching you try to take on four of these guys at once."

Peter blushed under his mask and firmly focused on the street below. "You know, I once thought being on a team meant I wouldn't have to take on four at once."

"It's a good thing I know you so well," Johnny teased with a wide grin.

Peter ran through what he said and blushed harder. "That's not what I meant!"

Johnny laughed and jumped up, his flames burning hot. "Race you back to your apartment? I'm feeling like Chinese."

Peter grinned and shot out a web. "Loser buys!"

With another laugh, Johnny took off, but Peter wasn't far behind. They'd done this hundreds of times, neither of them a clear winner. They were both too fast, too strong, too agile. It was exhilarating, flying with someone else. Just them under the night sky and New York below them. All of the boroughs, people, and buildings. It was beautiful. 

Peter arched himself high up and landed on the roof with a roll. He came up with both fists raised. "I win!"

Johnny swore and made a mock dive for Peter that resulted in a small tussle. It was mostly a fair fight, but there were a few serious hits and one kick. 

"Uncle, uncle!" Johnny cried when Peter managed to get him into a headlock. "Damn it, Spider-Man. Lay off, yeah?"

Peter rapped his knuckles on the top of Johnny's head. "Watch it. Half of your comments end up in the Daily Bugle. Everyone's going to be talking about how I beat up superheroes tomorrow at this rate."

Johnny raised his shirt and pointed to a bruise. "What's this then?"

"From the battle with the Doom Bots," Peter replied. "See, it's already yellowing." He poked at it.

The door to the stairwell opened and Wade's head poked out. "Oh. I thought I'd heard you two."

Oh. _Oh, shit._ Peter looked between Wade and Johnny, near frozen. He'd completely forgotten about Wade staying over. But Johnny was as much fun as Wade was. Peter couldn't be blamed for spending time with them both. Right?

Johnny took a deep breath. "Well. This is awkward."

Peter face palmed. "Guys, seriously. None of this now. Please? Wade just got back and I was really looked forward to Chinese. Truce? Please?"

Wade narrowed his eyes, opening the door further. Johnny crossed his arms. Peter groaned and tilted his head back. "I want to hang out with both of you! Without either of you trying to kill one another. For my sake, please, can we?"

Wade sniffed. "I can behave if he does."

Johnny huffed. "I can try I suppose."

Peter waved his arms. "That's all I ask for!"

~~~

Peter tapped his chopsticks against the takeout container. The chopsticks were a nice set, one of four. They had been a present from Johnny. (That it had been given within a week of Wade giving Peter a rice cooker -- for making Mexican food -- was something Peter tried not to think about.) Wade had almost refused to use them in favor of the disposable ones from the restaurant, but one look from Peter had quieted whatever argument Wade was going to make. Peter had tried to keep conversation going, but neither of his dinner guests seemed to want to talk and they'd all dissolved into a tense silence that seemed to herald world war three.

Johnny looked at Peter and winced. He cleared his throat. "So. You just got back, Wade?"

Wade blinked. "Yes. It took longer than I expected. A nice little job in South America, but damn is it hard to stay alive in some of those countries. Especially when they're facing civil unrest."

Peter raised his eyebrows. "You didn't tell me you died again!"

Wade shrugged, as always, like it was no big deal, but it hurt Peter to think about. That Wade would treat his own life so carelessly. He was important to Peter. And each death seemed to get that much worse. And it did give the cancer an edge for a week or so before his healing factor was fully recharged.

"Peter's got rules about death and his loved ones," Wade mock whispered to Johnny.

Johnny put his cheek on his hand, poking moodily at his food. "Don't I know it."

"If you two would just think about how it makes the rest of us feel!" Peter said, slamming his hand down on the table when they started to object. "No. I know. You both sacrifice yourself to save the rest of us, but you rarely think it through. That maybe we can find a different solution. No, you've got to be noble and put your life on the line and it..." Peter sniffed. He'd lost them both too often. "You don't think about what it's like for those of us left behind. How hard it is for us to live without you."

"Shit," Wade said, shoulders drooping. "We made our baby boy cry. We are terrible."

"Despicable," Johnny agreed. He set down his chopsticks. "I can't believe I'm saying this, but since it appears both us recently died -- or died in your case, I got lost in space -- I say we need movies and blankets on the couch."

Peter narrowed his eyes. "If you think for one second that cuddles will solve everything..."

Wade shared a conspiratorial look with Johnny before they both shrugged. "You don't get a choice," Wade told him.

Peter narrowed his eyes and crossed his arms. "I'd like to see you try."

Johnny grinned and held up Peter's web shooters. "I'm game. Wade?"

Wade shot up out of his seat. "On it!"

~~~

Peter burrowed further into the blankets around himself. He wasn't that upset anymore, but he refused to give them the privilege of knowing they had been right about how to cheer him up. They were watching some romantic comedy at the moment, Wade's pick; they'd finished Johnny's an hour ago. Some disaster epic. Peter wasn't sure yet if he was going to get to choose what they watched next, but for now, that was okay. He was wrapped nicely in a quilt and he was with his best friends. They hadn't fought in the last few hours.

"Feeling better yet?" Johnny asked, tilting the popcorn bowl towards him.

Peter took a handful. "Sort of."

"Peter needs lots of love before he feels one hundred percent again," Wade mumbled around his own handful.

Johnny cooed and wrapped an arm around Peter's shoulder. "That's alright. There's two of us. We can give him all the love he wants."

Wade grinned. "Finally, something we can agree on, Flame Man."

Peter looked at them both in turns. "I'd like this more often. You two, getting along."

Silence fell. Peter closed his eyes, embarrassed. He'd said too much. He knew it. He might as well have asked for the moon on a platter. What was wrong with him?

Wade cleared his throat. "I think I can try that. It hasn't been completely awful, this evening. Almost date like."

Peter blinked a few times, looking at Wade. He was... Stunned. Stunned was a good word. He turned to Johnny, cautiously hopeful. 

"Wait." Johnny stiffened. "Peter, I know that look. You're not... We can't... Well, we could, but..."

Peter bit his lip. "I thought you both knew how I felt about you. It's just hard because I didn't know how to pick between the two of you. And I didn't want anyone to feel hurt."

"Are you asking us both out?" Wade asked.

Peter swallowed hard and looked down. "Yes. Yes, I am."

Johnny blinked. "Date. Both of us. Together?"

Peter shrugged. "And apart. I don't want you two at odds with each other all the time so yes, time like this would be important. But I also want to have dates, one on one."

Wade took a deep breath. "Who knew it would be you that would suggest the threesome?"

Johnny chuckled, but it wasn't a happy sound. Peter groaned and let his head fall back in frustration. "I don't want just sex! I want you both to be my boyfriends!"

Silence fell. Heavy, thick. Peter could choke on it. He ran his hands through his hair, tugging a little. "Guys, forget it. Forget I said anything. Let's just watch this movie and then we'll round it out with my choice and then... I don't know. I'll stay here in misery and you two can go fuck off and forget all of my confessions."

Wade cooed and pulled Peter in with an arm around his shoulders. "Oh, no. None of that. Don't be upset. We're just... This is... We're just not sure yet what to make of this. But I mean, I'll be honest, if it means I get to date you, then okay. I'll be okay with that."

Peter leaned his head on Wade's shoulder. "Johnny?"

Johnny closed his eyes. "I... I can't. I'm sorry."

"Why not?" Wade hissed. Peter just turned his face into Wade's shoulder.

Johnny stood up. "Look. It isn't that I don't want to date you, Peter, but I can't even stand Wade. I can't. And you want me to be in a love triangle with him? No way."

Wade held Peter the rest of the night and didn't say anything when Peter cried for almost an hour.

~~~

Peter smiled as he looked up at the sign above the restaurant. "I should've known."

"What?" Wade, crossing his arms over his chest. "What's wrong with Mexican?"

Peter laughed and nudged Wade's shoulder with his own. "Nothing. I'm just not surprised."

Wade shrugged and waved Peter ahead of him. An actual waitress seated them, which surprised Peter at first, but then, watching Wade play with his silverware, he shouldn't have been. Wade was trying to make an impression, to do better. Wade wanted this to be memorable, nothing like anything they'd done before. They had had Mexican before; it was their usual go-to post mission, but this was more serious. 

This was their first date.

Peter grinned and propped his chin in his hand. Wade tilted his head. "What?"

"Nothing," Peter sing songed. "I just realized that you're trying to impress me."

Wade cleared his throat. "No. I am not. This is... I only just heard about it and thought it would be nice to try."

"You know every Mexican restaurant in the city," Peter pointed out. "This isn't a new place. You're trying to make this date memorable."

Wade sniffed. "So what if I am? This is our first date! Our _first_! It sets the tone for everything afterward and I want to make sure this is good for us. For our future."

Peter gave his drink order to the waitress and let Wade order their dinner. It wasn't much different from their usual, but it would take a little longer than they were used to. Sitting in the booth, Peter wondered _what now_? They would normally already have their food -- or it would only be a few moments away -- and then they'd be off back home to watch a movie or go up to a roof top.

"Hey," Wade said. 

Peter blinked, realizing that he'd been staring off into space. "Sorry. I'm just..."

Wade smiled softly and played with a sugar packet. "I know. I was thinking the same thing earlier today. This seems like such a big step. And it's familiar, but not, yeah?"

Peter smiled. He sat back in his seat and just waited. Wade wasn't wearing his mask; he was just himself. Wade Wilson taking a boy out to dinner on their first date. 

"But it's just us, isn't it?" Wade asked. "Two friends deciding that they're going to try to make it something more. Something good and lasting."

Peter nodded. "Yeah. So let's talk about the usual stuff. And after maybe we'll go back to my place and make out."

Wade's eyes went wide. "But that's too close to sex, Peter! I do not put out on the first date! No, sirree, I do not."

Laughing, Peter settled in for a good long listen to Wade's meandering thoughts. This was already a good date.

~~~

Peter saw Johnny's flame out of the corner of his eye while he was patrolling the next night. Should he stop? He hadn't heard from Johnny since he'd rejected Peter a week ago and Peter was still happily remembering last night's date with Wade. They had gone back to Wade's to play the new first person shooter and after a few hours of gaming, Peter finally got the kisses he'd wanted. Several hours of them. Nice, slow, and easy. Sweet almost. Peter's lips tingled just remembering it.

"Peter!" Johnny called, flying down to Peter's right. "Can we talk?"

Sighing, Peter twisted in the air at the peak of an arch and landed neatly on a gargoyle's head. Johnny landed on a ledge a moment later. "What's up, Johnny?"

Johnny fidgeted a little, shuffling his feet and his fingers tapping his thigh. "I've been thinking. About... You know. The threesome."

Peter rolled his eyes. "You mean when you rejected me outright without even trying?"

"God damn it, Peter," Johnny groused. "You proposed a three way relationship with my arch nemisis in your friendship! What did you expect would happen?"

Peter shrugged. "I don't know. Maybe for you to at least say, 'let me think about it?'"

"It wasn't like you'd loose me as a friend!" Johnny argued.

"Oh, no, you're right." Peter nodded. "Completely. I'd start dating Wade and you'd be the perfect, loyal friend who stuck around and wouldn't complain at all. That's Johnny Storm to a T. The man who almost killed Wade because his lawyer informed me that he was completely dead and whoops, no, he wasn't."

Johnny started fidgeting again. Peter swore under his breath. "I still have places to patrol. Say what you want and let me get on with my night."

"I'm saying okay," Johnny said. "Yes. I'd like to try it. The... Love triangle."

Peter frowned. "Seriously?"

Johnny nodded. Peter sighed. "Right. Come back to me when you can call it what it is: a relationship. It won't be anything sordid about it. It isn't accepted everywhere and I know it isn't normal, but lots of people have relationships with more than one person. And that's what I want. A relationship with two guys."

Johnny snorted. "You're expecting us both to behave? That'll happen when Doom stops terrorizing us."

"Wade's willing to make an effort," Peter snapped. He shot a web at the building across the street. "Like I said, talk to me when you can be a grown up."

~~~

"'Talk to me when you can be a grown up,'" Johnny imitated under his breath. He shot another flame at the target. "Sure. Like _I_ was the one acting like a kid. Wade wouldn't know adulthood if it kicked his ass."

Despite his words, Johnny knew exactly what Peter was talking about. For the relationship to work, he would have to set aside his animosity toward Wade. And it would really be down to him to do it. Wade would destroy the Earth if Peter asked. It would be difficult, Johnny knew, but if Peter was asking for them to play nice so he could date them both, Wade would keep his mouth shut and be an adult about the situation.

Johnny looked at the line up of scorched targets. He'd been in the range for two hours now and he was no closer to resolving anything. Well, he knew what he had to do, but the question was whether he was ready to.

~~~

Johnny knocked on Peter's door within the hour. It was great, being able to fly instead of being stuck in traffic. When Peter opened the door, Johnny blurted out, "Fine. I'll do it."

Peter blinked, confused. "What?"

Johnny sighed and spread his hands. "Act like an adult. I'd like to date you, Peter, and I'll be polite to Wade while doing so."

Peter crossed his arms and leaned against the doorway. "We're going to have group dates."

Wade jumped up from the couch, finger in the air. "But no orgies, right? Because Johnny isn't my type."

Johnny shuddered at the thought. "Ditto."

Peter smirked. "We're going to work up to the threesome sex."

Johnny and Wade looked at each other. " _No_." The word was said by them both, emphasizing it.

Peter nodded, unconcerned. "Yes. We'll talk about it later and why I want it, but as I said, we'll work on this."

Johnny sighed, looking up. "And there went my thoughts. Can't say I haven't thought about it, but definitely not with Wade."

Wade scoffed, sounding scandalized. "Perv! Why would you ever entertain the thought of sharing him?"

Johnny smiled, remembering exactly how he'd thought it would go. "Come on, man. Imagine someone attentive to him, helping you out with getting Peter all hot and bothered."

Wade sucked in breath. "Oh, oh. Okay. Wait. But no shared kisses."

Johnny nodded, considering it. "We could take turns."

Peter waved his hand. "Group date first and then sex."

Wade grinned, but then shuddered, almost mockingly. "With no-sex naked times in the apartment. So I can get used to looking at his ugly body before the sex."

Johnny narrowed his eyes. "Says the man who looks like he went through a human sized blender!"

Peter grabbed the front of Johnny's shirt and hauled him into the apartment. The door slammed closed. "Rules! Right here, right now. I'm laying down the law because I am not going to put up with this."

"Fun killer," Wade groused.

Johnny had to agree. "I know, right?"

Peter rolled his eyes. "Kill each other while I'm not watching, okay? Now, first rule is..."

~~~

Johnny, of course, took Peter to some swanky place for their first date. Peter had done his best with his clothes, but looking around, he was a few years out of date. Not that he had any clue about fashion, but he could at least compare what he saw on the street to this. And Peter? He was wearing clothes he'd bought for a fancy gig two years ago and he'd been outclassed then.

"Ignore them," Johnny whispered in his ear. He smiled at the maitre' d and gave his name. With a sharp look at Peter, the man lead them to a corner table tucked away from most of the other diners and away from the windows and doors. Peter let out a breath at the cover.

Johnny ordered them both a glass of wine as Peter dared to open the menu. At least there were prices listed so it wasn't completely beyond Peter's world, but the prices were high. He raised his eyebrows at what was just fancy fish n chips: $28!

"Don't think about it," Johnny said. He took away Peter's menu. "Is steak okay?"

Peter tilted his head. "You've been talking to Wade, haven't you?"

Johnny didn't blush, per se, but he did get a little pink. He looked away. "Of course not!"

Peter rolled his eyes. He put his hand over Johnny's where it lay on the menus. Johnny looked back at Peter, eyes a little wide and lost. Peter smiled. "Steak's fine, but just do your own thing. It's okay if you want to order for me, but don't do it just because he did."

Johnny let out a breath. "I just want this to be good for you. I didn't ask him for details, but he did let slip that you let him order your dinner. Like always. I thought maybe you like that kind of thing."

"My Mexican order is usually the same thing," Peter admitted. "That's why he ordered for me. I think it is nice if my friends and partners know me well enough to get my orders right, but sometimes I like to change things up."

Johnny blinked. "Wait. Wait, wait."

Peter waited. Patiently. He knew exactly what Johnny was doing, after all. 

"You do always order steak if we go somewhere!" Johnny finally said. "If we go inside and actually sit, anyway."

Peter smirked and sat back. "And you remembered. It takes a little bit to make steak for me -- I prefer it well done -- so I don't order it in my to-go meals. But if I get the chance, I'm going to get it. Lots of protein."

Johnny beamed. "I know that I knew it somehow, but it's good to realize it."

Peter thanked the waiter for their wine when it came and let Johnny order for him. He watched with a teasing smirk when Johnny looked at him while ordering, knowing that the other man felt like he had to pass a test, but Johnny got it completely right. Steak, well done; mashed potatoes and steamed broccoli; sour cream on the side.

"You passed," Peter said quietly. He leaned across the table and kissed Johnny's cheek.

Johnny beamed.

~~~

"You kissed him in the restaurant?!" Wade screeched, crashing through Peter's open window.

Peter tilted his head. He'd been getting changed out of his uniform for a shower; his last fight had taken him down into the sewers which gross, for one, and two, he could still feel the rats scurrying across his skin. This uniform was going straight to a garbage bag until he could get it to the Tower for a deep cleaning. Thank goodness for that blessing.

"A cheek kiss," Peter said. "Why?"

Wade waved a blade almost menacingly -- he was still in a heap on the floor. Peter crouched down. "You said you didn't put out on a first date."

"But it's not fair!" Wade groused.

"And you got the first date," Peter pointed out.

Wade rolled onto his back, still graceless. "Only because he couldn't act like the mature adult he tells people he is."

"While you did," Peter said.

Wade was silent for a moment. "I guess you're right. Adulting is much more important."

"I was going to have a shower," Peter said. "Can you make us popcorn and we can snuggle on the couch while watching a movie."

"Yeah!" Wade cheered, both hands in the air. "Wait. Are you showering because you smell like sewer?"

"Some villains do like it down there," Peter groused. "I'll wash three times just for you, okay?"

"With the apple stuff?" Wade asked.

Peter kissed his forehead (oh, ew, gross; it tasted like _sewer_. Why, Peter? he asked himself.) "Since you asked nicely."

~~~

"Can I request something special for our next date?" Johnny asked later in the week.

It was quiet tonight. Peter hadn't found too many people causing trouble so when Johnny asked if they could just fly, he'd said yes. The city flew by, a muted cacophony of noise and light. 

"This doesn't count?" Peter teased.

Johnny flew in close, causing Peter to shoot another web just to keep in the air. "Bastard!" Peter hissed.

Laughing, Johnny flipped onto his back. "That's me."

The next mile or so went by without any words. Peter flipped onto a ledge and Johnny followed him. "Our next date, can you wear that cologne I got you?"

Peter raised his eyebrows. "It isn't a competition, you know."

Johnny rolled his eyes. "Please. Like he didn't immediately go see you when I told him you kissed me in the restaurant."

"And I'll tell him, too," Peter said, exasperated. "It's not a competition."

"But you're going to wear it?"

"Call me a knucklehead, but yes, I will."

"Woohoo."

~~~

Peter looked left and then right and then at his dinner. Mexican and Chinese in one meal. Tea for starters and tequila for after. Chocolate cake for much later, during the movie. He propped his head on his hand. "Is there any actual plan here?"

Silence.

Peter looked at them both again. "Well?"

Still. Nothing.

Peter rolled his eyes. "I suppose you've resolved that if we're going to have group dates, you'll not be talking so as to avoid upsetting me?"

"And rule three, yes," Wade said. Finally.

"And five," Johnny added.

Rule three was no fighting -- even figuratively -- on dates (which had been preceded by rule two which said that neither of them could crash the dates) and five had been added last month -- no competitions.

Peter decided that silence was golden.

And later that silence was actually silver, being the color that duct tape came in. He had plenty in his apartment, but Johnny and Wade had broken out fresh rolls of it when they'd started fighting during the first movie.

Peter happily ate his cake. And then the rest of it while they watched, keeping only the two slices they'd initially claimed as off limits.

~~~

MJ was glaring at him with only one eye, the better to get her message across he thought. It was one of her more deadly looks, Peter decided.

"No," she said.

Peter swallowed hard and held up the garbage bag with his suit inside. "I just wanted to drop this off to get it cleaned."

She tapped at the tablet she now carried around almost constantly. Peter wondered if she could destroy the earth with just one tap now. Knowing Tony, probably.

"I've had Friday scan it," MJ finally said. "It's been sitting in your apartment for at least two weeks now. Judging by the smell, that means that you got into a fight that got something awful on it and now it's been cooking for two weeks. I'll send it to the incinerator."

Peter groaned and let his arms drop. He heard something that might've been the sewer water drip out of the bag (it had acquired a hole in it in the last few weeks which is the only reason why he'd remembered it) and a little cleaner bot came out to pick it up. Only, it came within a few feet an abruptly stopped.

"Even the cleaner bots won't go near it, Peter!" MJ groaned. "It's getting burned. We should have one of your spares around here."

Peter sighed. "But I have to get back to Queens! I've got to meet Aunt May for dinner!"

"Not my fault," MJ said sharply. She spun on one heel and left him no choice but to follow.

He was sure he'd been locked out of any path that lead him anywhere not the incinerator. He heard beeping as he walked away from the front entrance and saw the cleaner bot had been joined by a few others. It almost felt like it was a meeting of sorts -- maybe they were comforting the one who had initially come out to clean up? Or maybe they were going to take turns cleaning up, especially since he was creating a trail of water.

"While you're here, I can ask you about your boyfriends," MJ said. 

Peter stopped dead. "I'm sorry. What?"

MJ looked over her shoulder. "Sue told me."

Peter sighed. Of course she had. Johnny told Sue everything, especially if he was happy, and of course Sue told MJ. Out of concern, no doubt. Peter wondered at his own sanity for this. 

"Elevator, Peter," MJ called. The doors to said elevator were holding open. Some perks, huh? Peter could barely get the elevator at his apartment building to work, never mind the ones at The Bugle. 

She made him wait for the judgement. He held the bag between his spread feet -- he hadn't had time before this to go back to his apartment to change and he certainly wouldn't now, but he would definitely not show up to Aunt May's smelling like the sewer. He watched the numbers climb downward until they were on one of the floors for Tony's private labs. He'd been to this lab before, but didn't remember an incinerator.

"This level of..." MJ sighed. "I don't even have a word for it, Peter! What made you think it was a good idea to date one, let alone both of them! It has to be a nightmare on top of the nightmare that they both are!"

"Tony isn't around, is he?" Peter asked quietly.

"He won't help you," MJ said.

"But?"

"He's with Clint," MJ said. She waved her hand. "Now explain it to me."

Peter threw the bag into the marked door -- which no, hadn't been there before; what was Tony working on these days? -- and shrugged. "I like them both. What can I say?"

She shook her head. "Get out of here. Don't ask for any more favors until you've come to your senses."

He waved a hand over her shoulder as he left. He heard her arguing with Friday about something. He wished that their relationship hadn't turned so sour. He couldn't even say what had caused it to go bad, only that it had. He missed MJ, how they used to be. But she had Friday now, the two of them thick as thieves. And Peter didn't doubt that she'd find someone who was worthy of her. 

He thought about who he was dating at the moment and wondered if that hadn't driven them further apart; she'd never approved of Wade and Johnny was just too much empty flash to people who didn't want to get to know him.

He took out his phone. Aunt May had always had some words for Wade (who'd visited Peter at her apartment once or twice) and others for Johnny. She wouldn't be pleased to know that Peter was dating them both, but at least he could be polite and properly introduce everyone. Especially if the media ever got wind of this.

And with the rules in play, he knew they would try their best to behave. Especially for Peter's aunt. Better to tackle this head on, too, rather than have it surprise her, like it had for MJ. Peter had so few close friends and family that he should treat them better than he had been.

_Want to come to dinner with Aunt May?_

~~~

"Well, this is different," Aunt May said. She was cleaning dishes and Peter was drying them. Wade and Johnny were in the living room with coffee. They were waiting for Aunt May and Peter to finish the dishes and bring out dessert.

"I'm sorry?" he replied. He wasn't sure what she wanted to hear. He had thought maybe she'd say something else, but her silence now wasn't her waiting to get her thoughts in order. 

She gave him the last glass and leaned against the counter. "I suppose I should be grateful I didn't see it on the news first."

"I thought you should know first," he confessed. "MJ made me realize."

May closed her eyes. "At least you're finally really listening to her."

Peter ducked his head and put the glass away. He played with the edge of the towel, feeling awkward. It was like he was fifteen again, telling her that he had a girlfriend. He knew she wouldn't approve, but... _Oh, but what, huh, Peter?_ What _had_ he expected from this? For May to welcome them with open arms, no questions, sunshine and rainbows? And sure, he'd let her know before the rest of the city did, but that meant little compared to him bringing home _two_ boys, neither of whom would make anyone proud to call them son-in-law. And shit, marriage? Peter knew that May hoped he'd settle down after breaking up with MJ, that maybe he'd find someone suited to him and he'd get married again and maybe finally she'd have grandkids to spoil.

So much for that.

At least they were suited to him, he thought in a sad, odd way. They just clicked together. As weird as they all were, they worked. 

Peter smiled, leaning against the counter.

"Oh," May whispered. "You... Peter, why didn't you tell me?"

Peter blinked and looked at her. "What?"

She cupped his cheek. "You love them. I know you wouldn't bring just anyone around, but you honestly love them, don't you?"

Peter blushed and nodded. "Yeah. Yeah, I do."

She grinned and kissed his cheek. "I can't say I don't approve, but I haven't seen you in love with anyone since the early days of your marriage with MJ and those days, oh, Peter. They're so far away now and if you've found love again... Well, then I am happy for you. I can try to understand."

Peter shrugged. "That's what they're doing, too. Trying. For me."

She pulled him for a tight hug. "Peter, you love so few people, but draw in so many that you think you love. And those who love you hurt so much, for you to love them so little and for those who do love you but cannot find it reciprocated. They're trying, and I will try, because you have love again."

He sniffed. "Aw, May. Not now, huh? You know I can't handle these kinds of things."

She squeezed his shoulders. "I'm done. I promise. Now, let's serve these boys my famous chocolate cake and see if we can get another hour of politeness out of them."

"That sounds like an excellent plan, Aunt May. I'm sure the chocolate will help."

She finally let go of him and turned to get the cake. "Always does. Peter?"

He started taking out plates and forks. "Hmm?"

"I love you."

He smiled. "I love you, too, Aunt May."

~~~

They walked home from Aunt May's instead of taking a bus or the subway. It was a nice night. Peter sometimes patrolled on foot; the city was completely different this way and he got to actually take it in rather than swing above it, like some god. Peter was a hero for the city and he owed himself, his identity, to it. 

Wade was humming _New York, New York_ under his breath. He was out of uniform because of the visit to the in-law (his words), but right now, his hood was pulled up. He looked like a mugger, actually. Peter bumped shoulders with him and Wade absently bumped back. He seemed to be enjoying the walk as much as Peter.

Johnny? Johnny knew the city, just not as well as they did, but he was familiar enough with the bad areas that he kept his anxiety hidden. Peter reached out and took Johnny's hand in his. 

"Thanks for tonight," Peter said. "Aunt May will get there."

"She seemed different after you two talked," Wade said.

Peter shrugged. "We had one of those talks, the kind that parents have when their kids are grown up."

Johnny groaned. "Sue does that to me all the time! Like she sees me as an adult, but also the kid who still needs her to kiss his injuries."

Wade stopped. "What are those talks like?"

Peter tilted his head. "Nice. Comforting. You get the respect any adult who does right gets, but also... It's also acknowledging that they're still the person who raised you so knows you best and has more years of experience than you. I remember thinking as a teen that Aunt May and Uncle Ben couldn't have ever gone through what I had, but now? Now, it's nice to know that I can ask Aunt May about something, trusting that she'll have an answer because yeah, she's been there."

Wade scuffed his sneaker against the ground. "I'm envious of that. My grandma raised me and..." He shook his head.

"Hey," Peter whispered. He held out his free hand to Wade, sensing that Johnny needed him just as much in this moment. After all, there had been a time when Johnny had lost his family, too. 

Wade took the offered hand and Peter pulled him close for a quick kiss. "You've got Aunt May, too, you know. Just keep being polite and loving me and you'll always have her."

"Sue, too, I think," Johnny whispered, almost like a confession.

Peter turned his head to look at him. "You think so?"

Johnny smirked and winked at Wade. "I won't say that I love you, you idiot, but you're part of this whole mess we're making and that makes you part of my family. Sue might take awhile to come around, but once she does, you'll have her, too."

"Who knew dating a spider would come with a family?" Wade said, trying to lighten up the mood, but it failed. It couldn't not. 

Peter nuzzled his cheek. "Wade, when we all agreed to make this work, you had to know that we were going to become a family of three. But now we've also got extended family."

Johnny groaned. "I just realized how awful get-togethers are going to be! All of our superhero friends and Sue and Aunt May fighting over who's going to send us home with the most left overs!"

Peter closed his eyes. "Damn it."

Wade whistled. "Yeah, guess it isn't so bad to be on my own."

Peter looked at Johnny who nodded. They tackled Wade into a group hug. "You're not alone!" they screamed together.

"Help!" Wade shouted. "I'm being crushed by my boyfriends!"

Peter kissed him to shut him up.

~~~

"By the way," Johnny said, sounding casual, but Peter could tell he wasn't. His shoulders were tense. "Boyfriends?"

Wade paused the game and looked over his shoulder. "Yeah? What else do I call you? We're not lovers."

Johnny looked at Peter and Peter? Had nothing. "What? We're all dating."

"In a roundabout way?" Johnny said, hesitatingly. "I mean, I agreed to date you, Peter. And, sure, group dates, but Wade and I aren't... We don't even want..."

"Is there a term for that?" Wade asked thoughtfully.

Peter sighed, seeing his hope for an uninterrupted game dashed. After they got back to Wade's apartment, Peter thought that they could have a few hours of gaming before they went to bed or headed out on patrol. Depended on their mood. Peter was leaning toward sleep, but one never knew with Wade. Or Peter's insomnia for that matter.

He was surprised to see Johnny still with them. Johnny, as far as Peter knew, had never set foot in here and hadn't wanted to. But when Wade had suggested a game back at his place, Johnny tagged along. Even picked out a few snacks at the bodega on the way.

This might just work out, Peter thought hopefully.

"My boyfriend's boyfriend?" Peter suggested.

Wade wrinkled his nose. "That's a terrible mouthful. Not enjoyable at all. Nope. Don't want it."

"Friend?" Johnny asked. 

Wade see sawed his hand. "Dubious."

Peter looked at them both in turns. "I think no one here objects to the term 'boyfriend' and anyone who does is a lying liar with his pants on fire."

Wade grinned. Johnny groaned. "Stop it! That's not... I just..."

"Hey, we don't have to love each other," Wade said. "Just love Peter enough to have his true love forever, even with each other."

Johnny kicked him. Wade tackled him with a screech. Peter sat back. It wasn't against the rules, this time; they weren't fighting about Peter or for Peter and weren't beating each other up out of hatred or even animosity. It was just fighting like friends fought. Playfully. 

A table broke and Peter winced. As much play as could be had between two super powered people, anyway.

At least they were getting along?

~~~

When Peter woke up, he could smell toast.

When he came home last night, he was alone. His apartment was empty. So if he hadn't made toast then he had an intruder. Who was hungry? For that matter, how had said traitor made the toast? Peter's toaster had broken down last week when Wade had stabbed it with a katana (it'd spooked him when he'd forgotten that he had been making toast). Plus, Peter hadn't been grocery shopping since last week (Johnny this time who insisted that if he was going to stay at Peter's, he would need food and not just take out).

Groaning, mindful of his still bruised ribs, Peter sat up and scrubbed a hand through his hair. Maybe his intruder would eat and run. And take the toaster with him. Peter could still smell burnt flesh from Wade when he'd been electrocuted during the toaster-katana incident. It had put him off toast.

"Peter, get out here!" Johnny called.

"Before he burns down your apartment!" Wade added.

Oh. _Oh._

Peter shuffled into the kitchen/living room, not bothering to remove his pants.

Wade whistled. "My favorite outfit, baby boy!"

Johnny looked up from toasting bread by hand and smirked. "Late night?"

"I thought we agreed no more meeting at my place?" Peter countered. He wrinkled his nose at the plate of toast waiting, he suspected, for him and opened the fridge. If he knew Johnny, there would be something else he could eat. Aha! Eggs.

"No toast?" Johnny asked, faking hurt in his voice. It had been him after all who had laughed the hardest at Peter's outrage for last week's electrocution. Dating Peter though they were, Johnny and Wade only got along. 

"Peter's being kind," Wade sniffed. "He's hurt because I was hurt."

Peter put the eggs down on the counter and started looking for his fry pan. Wade and Johnny liked to help out and that meant that Peter's dishes never actually went where he wanted them because both his boyfriends had decided that they knew best where dishes went.

"No one asked you to kill the toaster," Johnny pointed out.

"Who makes toast in one of those things anyway?" Wade groused. He rolled up his mask to eat the toast left out for Peter. "When I grew up, we made it in the oven. That's toast. Not what comes out of a toaster and certainly not this stuff."

Johnny smirked and finished with the slice in his hand. "You're still eating it." He plated his toast and started buttering it.

"Just a snack before burritos!" Wade said cheerfully.

Johnny shot off a bit of flame in his direction. "No more burritos. Not if we're sharing Peter at the same time. You know the rules."

"Peter!" Wade whinned. "Tell him I need burritos to live!"

Peter yawned and leaned back against the counter. No frying pan to be found. "No burritos otherwise Johnny leaves and I'll be pissed off. You know that. That's why there's rules."

Wade groaned and let his head fall onto the table. "I hate you both."

Peter patted the back of his head on his way to check the cabinet by the sink. "Johnny maybe, but not me."

Wade was silent. Johnny cheerfully ate his toast. Peter finally found his pan. When he turned around, he remembered why he'd left his room. "We agreed that we wouldn't be meeting up at my place anymore as I can't afford the repair bills from whatever trouble you two stir up. What gives?"

Wade lifted a hand to point at Johnny who picked up a newspaper. "Front page!"

It was JJ's paper. Oh boy. Peter passed it on his way to the stove.

 **Spider-Man Caught In Love Triangle!** was the headline followed by **What about poor Peter Parker?** under it.

"Well, good morning to me," Peter mumbled. "I need coffee to deal with this. Tell me one of you made coffee."

~~~

Peter gave up on his eggs when he got a call from Tony. He grabbed a breakfast sandwich from Starbucks on his way to the tower plus the biggest coffee he could get.

"Coffee is bad for you," Wade groused. He'd elected to not get anything until someone agreed to let him have something Mexican.

Johnny shrugged, drinking an iced coffee. "If Doom and a whole host of other things can't kill me, I'm going to damn well drink the coffee."

Wade huffed. "I don't care much if you live or die, Flame Boy. I was talking about _Peter_. What would we do without him?"

Peter glanced at Johnny as he sipped his drink, intrigued. Johnny considered the question carefully. "Before or after I die of coffee poisoning?"

Wade wiggled his hand back and forth. "Let's go with before. I hate dealing with death questions this early in the morning. I mean, if I say after then we have to figure out if you're actually going to come back and if it's as a ghost and if so, what would a ghost actually do besides haunt me until I could get Doctor Strange to get you to move on?"

Peter nodded because that made sense in a Wade sort of way. Johnny grinned. "I want to continue that thread later."

"Of course you do," Wade grumbled.

"Later," Peter said. "For now I want to hear the theory of what you two do without me."

Johnny wrapped an arm around Peter's shoulders and kissed his temple. "Aw, Peter. You know you're the center of our world. That's why we'd fight to the death without you. Because we'll fight about who killed you."

"Except that in this scenario, I died because of coffee," Peter pointed out. "So neither of you is at fault. And!" He pointed at each of them in turn as they opened their mouths. "We're not going to argue that one of you gave me more coffee than the other. Just assume that I was the one who got enough coffee to kill me."

They were silent for a moment. "Kill each other," they said in unison.

Peter sighed. "Come on. We have a crisis at the Tower that needs fixing."

"More like you need to stop making out with both of us whenever the opportunity presents itself," Johnny argued.

"Then he'll just have to pick one at a time," Wade said. "I want to go first! I get first date night make out!"

Peter waved to the guard on duty and swiped his card at the elevator. He waited for Johnny and Wade to do the same.

"No, I get to," Johnny hissed.

Wade huffed. "Nope. By my counts, you've been able to make out with him ten times in public. I've only gotten seven. That gives me a leg up in getting first in line."

"Ten times?" Johnny shook his head. "I don't even know where you get your numbers from. It's been five to three, you in the lead. So I get first in line."

~~~

MJ greeted them first in the common room. "You know, Tiger, when I said don't come back until it was sorted, this isn't what I meant."

Peter shrugged. He was feeling too good to be bothered. "Is this meeting going to involve food? I've only had a breakfast sandwich and we all know that never fills me up."

MJ glared at Wade and Johnny. "You can't even feed him?"

"I made toast!" Johnny protested.

"Except, because of last week, Peter's gone off toast," Wade said.

Peter nodded at her raised eyebrow. She rolled her eyes. "Lucky for you, it's early enough and we have enough super powered people here that Tony sent up catering."

"Tony?" Peter froze on the spot. "Tony's here?"

MJ smirked over her shoulder. "Second guessing those make out sessions?"

Wade took a deep breath. "I'm sure Captain America's here, too?" MJ ignored him by simply walking away. Wade groaned. "I'm going to get killed today. This is worse than meeting Aunt May and Sue!"

"At least Tony's morally grey?" Johnny offered, though he didn't sound too sure himself. "At least he isn't going to care too much about your mercenary ways?"

"But I've defiled one of his adopted kidlets!" Wade pointed out, waving an arm.

Peter started leading the way in. "It could've been worse. You could have gone after Rhi-Rhi."

"If I actually had a death wish, sure," Wade agreed. "I'm not sure who'd kill me faster: her or Tony."

Most of the Avengers were present and some who weren't could be seen on a giant screen. Everyone was talking, seemingly treating this like a neat, unplanned get together at breakfast time. Peter darted in real quick to grab a plate of said breakfast foods before he went in to face the music. He paused though, realizing he was alone. He looked over his shoulder and half smiled. Johnny had been pulled aside by Reed (who hadn't known, going from the look on his face) and Wade was getting an earful from Steve Rogers.

Someone tapped him on the shoulder. Gently.

Peter blinked and turned around. "Oh. Hey, Clint."

Clint waved. "Just wanted a quick word or two. You know."

Peter blinked. "I don't? Is this the plan? Break us down on our own without help from each other?"

Clint laughed and pulled Peter toward the food table. "Nah. Well, I don't know about the others. I just wanted to let you know that I have your back. I'm sure you remember everyone's warnings when Tony and I started our dysfunctional relationship."

Peter smirked. "I remember that. It was all anyone would talk about for months."

Clint shrugged, unrepentant. "Tony does like the spotlight. Right now, though? It's hard because I know how I would feel if Kate showed up dating two of the worst scum from her fancy set, but I also know how it feels when everyone doubts your ability to make a good decision."

Peter picked up some Belgian waffles and eggs (finally!) as well as some bacon and potatoes. Good food for running away later. Lots of carbs and protein. "Do you actually ever make good decisions, though?"

"Ask anyone and the answer is no," Clint admitted. "But we're not talking about me. We're talking about you. I get a call this morning and I think, 'what should I do?' And the answer was simple. Stand by you."

Peter raised his eyebrows. "Really?"

Clint nodded. "Yeah. Because I looked hard at those photos and man, are you in love with both of them. Yeah, we probably could wish you'd date someone better -- as anyone whose known you since you were a teen would -- but I know you're going to need an ally more than another over protective superhero. You love them and I don't know how you're doing this, but you're committed, _all_ of you. So I want to support you when everyone starts making demands."

Peter scrubbed a hand through his hair. "Is that what this is about? I got a call from Tony and I thought, well, maybe he just wants to cover press stuff. Then we get here and everyone's shown up!"

Clint smirked. "Of course they did! So many of us have been in the game for a long time and then you came along. A little teen in need of help. Guidance. And we took you in -- but you know what that means?"

Peter groaned. "In-law meeting?"

Clint clapped him on the shoulder. "Exactly! Johnny and Wade have to face down one of the toughest 'meet the parent' meals ever! We all know them and they knows us, but now it's different."

Peter shook his head. "I should have stayed in bed."

"Probably," Clint said. "But at least we're getting this done and over with. After this, you'll just have to prove to us that you're worth the love you're giving each other."

Peter eyed the group waiting for him and his boyfriends. "That might be easier than this."

Clint sighed. "It always is. Now come on. Let's face the music."

~~~

Wade collapsed into the bed, making a wounded noise. He said something, but it was completely muffled by the bed. Peter poked him. "Shove over. I want a nap, too. I had a late night fighting criminals and a superhero interrogation this morning."

Johnny leaned against the doorway. "Just a normal day for me."

Wade rolled over for Peter. "I do not envy you for that."

Peter smiled and laid down, snuggling close to Wade who made a happy noise. Soon, Peter was enveloped in the happiness that was his boyfriend's arms. 

Johnny sighed. "I never thought that I'd be okay with that sight, but somehow I am."

Chuckling, Wade turned his head so he was audible. "I'm wearing you down. Soon, you'll be as in love with me as Peter is."

Johnny scoffed. "As if."

Peter tilted his head back so he could get his words out without them getting lost in his nest in Wade's arms. "Join us?"

Johnny considered it, tilting his head one way and then the other. "What do I get out of it?"

"We'll have Chinese later," Wade offered.

Silence fell. Peter could practically hear a pin drop. 

Wade blinked a few times, confused. "What? Oh, the compromise? Peter needs love and wants it from both of us. I can concede food choice if Peter gets what we wants."

Johnny shrugged. "I'm in then. I like this."

"Mexican tomorrow?" Wade asked quietly, just for Peter to hear.

Peter smiled. "Behave and we'll see."

"Best behavior, baby boy. Best behavior."

~~~

Later, Peter managed to crawl out from between them when he woke up before either of them did. He had a faint headache from over sleeping, but that was to be expected. He'd managed to get another two hours. He smirked when Wade and Johnny grabbed onto each other's arm without him to buffer them. He snapped a photo before heading to the bathroom. And then saved it several times to various storage sites. No way was he going to loose that one.

After relieving himself and doing a quick wash up, he put in their order for food, knowing it by heart. Hell, the restaurant didn't even need him to recite it; they'd see his number and asked who was eating today. He stared at his phone for a long moment after that ended, smiling softly. Even their favorite places knew.

He texted MJ.

_I'm sorry I was such a shit._

MJ didn't make him wait too long.

_About time._

Peter tapped his fingers on the counter, thinking.

_I know you don't want me even in your neighborhood again, but I hope we can at least try to be friends._

And then, because that wasn't enough,

_You were my best friend once. I'd like that again. Or something like it._

Her reply was a long time coming. So long in fact, he wondered if the food would get delivered first.

But then it was exactly what he expected when he did get it.

_I reserve the right to layout each and every reason why you're having a personal crisis, either with your boyfriends or anything else. Because I know you so well that I'll be able to predict what'll happen._

Yeah, that was MJ. Peter smiled.

_After everything I've done, of course._

She didn't say anything else, but she didn't have to. Peter didn't need to hear anything else. Not yet. It would take a long time, but he thought that they could get back to a good friendship again. He started a new text because he hadn't heard from Aunt May yet.

_So you've probably seen the news._

Her reply was much faster. She'd probably only been waiting for him to say something first, out of respect.

_And the statement from the Avengers' PR. That was a nice twist. But how do they feel about it?_

Peter wondered if it was worth it to pretend he didn't know the _they_ she was talking about. It wasn't. (It would mean strawberry cheesecake at their next dinner together and if there was one desert she couldn't make? It was strawberry cheesecake.)

_They're okay with it. I mean, it isn't perfect, but they're already started deciding who gets the first proper make out session._

Her reply was almost instantaneous.

_Please tell me they're joking!_

He looked at the bedroom where they were, no doubt, trying to figure out how to get out of bed without it being awkward.

_They're not, but they wouldn't actually do anything about it. After the PR statement, they've promised to behave in public. Like gentlemen._

_Those boys promising to behave like gentlemen? I'll believe it when it happens._

_I thought it had? They were perfectly polite at dinner with you._

_Oh, sure. If you call nicely behaved when Wade was discussing an old job where he had to take out a whole cartel and Johnny laughing._

_So they're not perfect?_

_It's good thing you're not either._

_Ouch._

_Come to dinner tomorrow. We need to figure out how I'm going to introduce your boys to my friends without anyone realizing that you're you-know-who._

_Gasp! How did you find out that I'm actually Voldemort?_

_Nerd. I raised a nerd._

_Yes, yes, you did. Now this nerd is going to have dinner with his boyfriends and let you worry if we're being respectful toward each other._

_More like behaved in public. Tomorrow, Peter!_

_I'll put it on the calendar._

"Why did you do that?" Johnny yelled, leaving the bedroom. His hair was tousled and he was blushing bright red.

Peter grinned and snapped a photo. Saved it very quickly. "Because I'm a little shit?"

"That's for sure!" Wade shouted, shoving at Johnny's shoulder as he left the bedroom. "Who else would leave us to... To... Argh!"

A knock on the door forestalled the rest of the argument. "Dinner's here!" Peter said cheerfully. "Also, we're having dinner with Aunt May tomorrow. She wants to help make sure no one knows I'm you-know-who."

"Voldemort?" Wade gasped. And then slapped his hands over his mouth. "Oh, shit!"

Johnny blinked. "I'm not sure what's going on?"

Peter cocked his head. "Wait, what?"

"Movie night! All eight!" Wade yelled. "Peter, you know where your wand is? Just in case the curse is still active and we get surprised by You-Know-Who?"

There was another knock, more insistent. "Someone ordered some food?" the delivery guy shouted.

Johnny shook his head. "Dorks. The both of you. We're not watching some nerd series while eating Chinese food."

Peter smirked. Wade grinned. "Yes!" they shouted together.

Johnny groaned and took their food from the delivery guy. "No."

The delivery guy raised his eyebrows. "Uh, have a good evening?"

Johnny snorted. "Yeah, right." He shut the door before any demand for an explanation could happen.

Peter got out the chopsticks and napkins. "You have to know about Harry Potter."

"Don't," Johnny said absently. He was unloading the bags.

Peter narrowed his eyes. "You do. Don't you?"

The back of Johnny's neck was pink. Peter smirked.

"Should I go get my wand?" Wade asked absently. "Two is better than one after all."

Johnny looked up. "Peter, do you have that prop?"

Peter leaned back in his chair. "What do you think?"

Wade grinned. "I'm imagining taking you to that park down in Florida. That would be so much fun! Just think about it, Peter!"

"Great, you two can get your nerd on and I'll get nice and tan," Johnny said. He offered a box of fried rice to Peter. "Truce?"

Peter frowned. "What're we going to watch instead?"

They were silent for a moment.

"Chick flick?" Wade asked. "I'm feeling a need for The Notebook."

Peter nodded and looked at Johnny who also nodded.

Wade cheered. Johnny rolled his eyes. Peter ate his fried rice. It wasn't perfect, but he didn't need perfect. He just needed his two dysfunctional boyfriends. And thank goodness they finally knew and accepted that.


End file.
